living out of my suitcase...
Current mood: thoughtful

...and missing my bed.

Things have been both whirlwind and placid.

Some fleeting mutterings of the past month of wanderings:

*The mornings alone with my mom, drinking coffee and watching TV. Glancing at her from the corner of my eye and feeling a stab of panic...

*The paper-thin feeling of my great-grandmothers hand as her watery eyes probed my face for a trace of recognition.

*Wanting to yell at the Amish boy riding his bicycle without a helmet, but knowing he's not allowed to wear it.

*Driving a double king cab Dodge Ram diesel pickup truck in the pouring rain along a mountainous road, all the while pounding on my left leg to keep it from wanting to step on the non-existent clutch in panic.

*The feeling of my moms shoulderblades as she hugged me goodbye at the airport.

*My mom and I crying with laughter as we watched Little House on the Prarie with the sound turned off and devised our own lines for the citizens of Walnut Grove.

*Pouring through her photo albums and trying to find someone I recognized in the pictures of myself as a small child.

*Utter sadness when I had to leave my great-grandmother at the hospital.

*Resigned horror when they made me check my bag for the flight to Florida.

*Watching the manatees in the river.

*Paddling out in the ocean kayak and coming nanoseconds from wetting myself when I saw a fin surface about 20 feet away... (dolphin, not shark for those who care)

*Walking through Dupont circle as streetlights illuminated piles of wet leaves